My cousin-in-law...

"zeontestpilot" (zeontestpilot) 07/28/2014 at 15:37 • Filed to: family

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...says some of the best things I have every heard...ever...via Facebook. He's in college and such. I had to share this...

A recent study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another study found that Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year. That means that, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon…

mr_gofast > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 15:43

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ahahah i just posted that...or a variation on it....wow ..

macanamera > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 15:44

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Are we talking about gallons of alcoholic beverages, or literally pure alcohol?

EL_ULY > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 15:46

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i run on Strawberry Nesquik, more efficient :]

zeontestpilot > macanamera 07/28/2014 at 15:46

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Hmm, good question....

zeontestpilot > mr_gofast 07/28/2014 at 15:47

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Really? Link please?

zeontestpilot > mr_gofast 07/28/2014 at 15:49

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I'm trying to figure out 'where' he gets this stuff. Its just amazingly humorous. He's either very original, or he has a source.

Earlier today, I got this gem from him.

Sign said "WET PAINT" So I emptied my Dasani water bottle on it. I'm currently waiting on further instructions.

mr_gofast > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 15:50

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http://oppositelock.jalopnik.com/so-what-mpgs-d…

zeontestpilot > EL_ULY 07/28/2014 at 15:50

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Don't lie, there's cookie pieces in it, isn't there?

EL_ULY > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 15:51

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Not 50 states legal :]

zeontestpilot > EL_ULY 07/28/2014 at 15:56

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I knew it. Texas is exempt from just about anything, thats why.

EL_ULY > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 16:04

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lol

Diesel > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 16:28

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I get 1 mile per liter. I'm very bad for the environment.

zeontestpilot > Diesel 07/28/2014 at 16:32

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Easy solution. Drink and walk at the same time.

Diesel > zeontestpilot 07/28/2014 at 16:33

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I just go to a German Biergarten and drink all day long twice a week. Then, focus on keeping the miles traversed low.

zeontestpilot > Diesel 07/28/2014 at 16:35

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Ah, good idea. Later on in life you'll be considered to be in 'pristine' condition, and more more valuable then those who are 'high mileage'